Why vets are magical
In the middle of May, towards the end of the first round of the garden work, I took my pair of silly kittens to the vet for a worming tablet, a general checkup, and a chat about Clover’s intermittent coughs and sneezes.
Clover was pronounced fine (we suspect mild asthma, but not severe enough to need treatment – just to monitor, as it could also be caused by the dust and stress from the building work).
Luna, on the other hand, found herself booked in the following week for an operation to remove a tooth.
Which is definitely not what I was expecting! And having lost our family dog Harriet late last year after she went into the vet for an operation, I was understandably incredibly worried about letting my precious kitty go in, while also knowing I couldn’t leave her in pain.
My vet practice, Colne Valley Vets on the Hythe in Colchester, is amazing – the vet nurses who booked us in were calming, reassuring and obviously loved animals – I think we even got a small purr out of madam Luna on the way in. They called me as soon as she’d woken up, with the happy news that she still had all her teeth, and the problem had been caused by an overgrown gum, which had been trimmed away and should now stop causing her pain.
And when I went to collect her, they went through everything in detail, listened patiently to my questions, and then took me through to see the vet when I asked about the small cut on her ear. He was cuddling her when I went in (and she was lapping up the snuggles)- I love that they cuddle their patients! Her ear injury is consistent with a paw swipe from the right hand side, so we concluded she was probably defending her realm from the various intruder cats who are quite excited at the idea of two young, pretty lady-cats living here…!
She has two patches of fur missing where they gave her the drip and the anaesthetic, and though they assured me she’d be sleepy and want only soft food, she was running around like a squirrel on steroids and refusing to eat anything but crunchy biscuits… and since she’s recovered fully and been allowed back outside again, she’s been twice as excited about her food, and very meowy and happy… and of course, extra silly.
And I am so relieved she came through it ok that she’s getting even more hugs and playtime than usual. I don’t know if it’s true for all pet owners, but I had absolutely no clue how much I’d love the little furry idiots – I couldn’t love them any more if they were human children. Which probably explains my near-constant state of terror that something might happen to them…
More kitty goodness over at SillyKittens.co.uk (yep, they have a whole blog of their own) and on their Instagram, Facebook and Twitter accounts 🙂
All change… but only on the surface
It has been a crazy busy first third of the year… the most packed I can remember, and I don’t say that lightly.
Also, how the hell is it May?!
It feels a lot like everything’s changing – only of course it isn’t, it’s just that weird temporary feeling I always get when everything’s up in the air and I’m a bit anxious about it all.
(my life is nothing like as organised as the type in this picture…)
Things contributing to overwhelm (which are also fabulous)
Thing #1 – mermaid school is a thing. Not only is it a thing, it’s my thing! The first edition of Run Away Days’ mermaid spa runs on Wednesday, and I have for once had a completely one track mind about it. It’s actually really nice to have prolonged laser focus on just one project, but I’ve definitely reached the point where I’m annoying myself with my perfectionism. So at 9pm when the event is the day after tomorrow, I am calling time on my inner perfectionist and proclaiming that done is better than perfect. It’s already going to be amazing so I need to stop beating myself around the head with my perceived failings.
Also, I have two more bookings, a tail sale and another enquiry – and I haven’t actually advertised it yet! So am muchly excited for the future of my beautiful little mermaid school.
Thing #2 – My fledgling photography business has also taken off quietly in the background, as often happens to me when I’m trying to focus on one thing. This time, photography sessions have snuck in and taken on a life of their own – simply because I’ve finally got over myself, accepted it’s something I do (and do well), and actually told people I’m a photographer. It is amazing what that piece of information does… after all, most people don’t have a crystal ball kicking around, do they?!
There is a whole weekend of mini-sessions lined up in May with the Burlesque Jems, and a very exciting styled shoot collaboration with the gorgeous Louise Rose Couture, as well as some wonderful local artists, authors and artisans who want personalityful images of them at work and at play.
With two distinct strands – solopreneurs in the Business Soloist sessions, and women celebrating their true selves in Unfurling Your Wings sessions, I’m having a glorious time finally doing what I’ve wanted to offer, but have been scared to, for the best part of a decade.
Thing #3 – I am about to start smashing up my garden and re-landscaping. I say “I” – I really mean my brilliant builder Mark and his team, and my lovely parents who are once again project managing. I can’t wait to have a proper garden to enjoy the summer in, but with a digger and a skip the size of my drive arriving tomorrow, I’m mainly just freaking out about the cats. Though I suppose logically, if they can jump *into* the skip, they should also be able to jump *out* of the skip. No?!
At any rate, I’m tasking Mum with keeping them indoors until the builders have gone home each evening. Cross bored kitties are definitely better than squidged-by-digger kitties… they’re much too curious for their own good!
Thing #4 – I think it probably says quite a lot about my current state of overwhelm that I can’t even remember what thing 4 is.
Thing #5 – It’s trade show season for Ink Drops and we are having a completely wonderful time mooching round the Stationery Show and Progressive Greetings Live, drooling over new stationery, getting to know new suppliers and saying hi to our lovely existing ones.
On the plus side…
Delightful stuff that isn’t overwhelming
I got to meet up with Mermaid Azela last weekend, and we spent two hours swimming and taking photos and videos of each other underwater. It was a totally gorgeous way to spend a Sunday afternoon and we’re definitely going to do it again soon!
Cats make excellent Kindle stands… or at least, my Luna-kitty does. Clover stalked off in disgust when I tried it.
But then, all the comfy places in the world to sit and she chooses an old recycling box…
I’ve also been doing lots of reflecting, learning and reading… more on that in another post.
For now – I believe it’s time for bed, so I have a fighting chance of being awake when the diggers and the skip and the ballast and the paving stones arrive in the morning…!
Be the one who people talk about
In my youth, I was often the subject of whispers and giggling. In one memorable-for-all-the-wrong-reasons occasion when I was fourteen, I was also the subject of a secret bet – how long would the boy I was dating put up with me before he dumped me? (Answer, delightfully, seven years – take that, haters – and it was a heartbreaking but also fairly amicable split).
If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of people laughing as you walk past, speculating on your dateability or worth based on your looks, making comments about the way you look as though your body is public property, it leaves an intangible, but indelible mark on you.
I still look up nervously when I hear a group of people burst into laughter – there’s a tiny part of me that still believes they’re laughing at, or about me.
Though this reaction drives me up the wall, I have also developed a really good way of dealing with it. I once described myself as the person people invite to a party so that they have an anecdote to tell afterwards.
I have, over the past few years, become the girl that people talk about.
They talk about the things I do, the wild and intense yet passing passions I have for an infinite variety of things, the pace of my life and the sheer number of delightful things I fit into it.
They talk about my persistence, my determination, my absolute focus on the things that matter to me, and my ability to ignore or deprioritise what I don’t consider to be important.
They talk about my love for who I am, who I’ve become, and my relationship with myself.
They talk about my fire, my zing, my unstoppable energy and my infectious enthusiasm.
They talk about the way I’m truly at home in my body and myself and my skin, and I love it for, not in spite of, all its supposed flaws I’m told I should hate and change. About the way I wear whatever the hell I want, regardless of fashion or body type or guidelines. Just what makes me feel good wearing it.
They talk about how I question the status quo of everything, from working hours to food to friendships and relationships and living.
They talk about my imagination, my ability to make my dreams real, and the path I’m on which gives them permission to start on their own.
I am still, very much, the girl people talk and whisper about. But this time, it’s on my terms – and the more they talk, the more people will find the courage to follow their own dreams.
What do you want people to say about you?
What do you want to become part of your identity, so others can’t help but make the connection between that and you?
What do you long to do, or be, or experience, to see if your heart sings when you do?
This is your permission slip – go and do it. Create it. Try it. Experience it. It might be wonderful or terrible, but you’ll never know unless you try.
And you’ll give people something to talk about…
This post first appeared on Carla Watkins Photography. Syndicated with permission (from myself, ha!).
Rediscovering campus
My day job is at the University of Essex, on a beautiful and quite big campus made up of parkland, woodland and buildings. The buildings are quite 60s, concrete and brutal… but the grounds are spectacular, and we even have two lakes, a country house hotel and a campus “farm” (large allotment, really).
When I first came here, following working close by the Barbican in London (equally brutal but less scenery, more people, and my actual office was the least inspiring building ever), I was captivated. That I could go for walks every day, spend time in woodland and by water, and all without bunking off work or going more than ten minutes from my house, seemed like a dream.
Somehow, in the last three and a half years, I’d forgotten to be entranced by the gorgeous surroundings I work in. Reading back through my five year diary for a podcast I’m doing soon, I realised how much I longed for green space and water when I couldn’t have it.
I have now firmly told myself off for taking it for granted, and am trying to spend more time outdoors – especially now the weather is behaving itself!
A peek inside my handbag
It’s almost two years since I last did a “what’s in my bag” post, and today I was doing some product shots anyway, so I emptied my bag.
Definitely doing better than before… though no kitty helper in this picture!
My purse: pretty standard object for a handbag, this one is the one that was stolen when I was visiting a friend, and then found its way back to me eight months later, courtesy of Reading police station.
My phone: another pretty standard item, this is my Honor 7 – I made the leap away from Samsung a month or so ago, when prices got ridiculous. So far, I’m delighted with my choice!
Burts Bees lipbalm: winter essential. This one’s mango flavoured, I love it.
Emergency charger: not that necessary yet as new phone has amazing battery life. Which is just as well, given I appear to have misplaced the actual lead to connect it to my phone…
Tangle Teezer hairbrush: my new favourite thing. I left my hairbrush on my day job desk before the bank holiday weekend, and rather than go in to fetch it, just didn’t brush my (waist length) hair for two days. Bought this, spent 20 mins brushing my hair, it was soft and smooth and tangle-free again. Properly impressed.
Four pens: an improvement on the last time I did this, when I had a pencilcase containing 15! The last of these is also a stylus and torch.
Tissues: because I’m permanently sniffly.
Mermaid tail fabric sample: I mean, who doesn’t carry one of these in their bags?! I’ve been bikini shopping and wanted to see which ones best suited my tail, as I rarely swim without it any more.
Antihistamine tablets: See tissues. (Also an improvement on the half a pharmacy I usually cart around)
Keys: I have no idea why these keys are in my bag, they’re not my front door keys or my car keys. But at least I now know where they are!
Sleek pout polish: instant lip balm and blusher. Which is 90% of the makeup I wear most days.
My Winter fabric swatch pack from In Love With Colour: Since having my colours done I carry this everywhere – the colours I choose are mostly instinctively Winter, but it’s nice to have confirmation when I’m out and about
A Creme Egg and a Wispa: my all time favourite chocolates. Just in case I get munchy.
My beloved Fuji point-and-shoot: I use this camera like other people use notebooks, and record stuff that’s happening, people and life, and also the things and places and ideas I want to come back and shoot with my full kit. It’s also a really pretty camera!
Chewing gum and YET ANOTHER LIP BALM: apparently I really, REALLY like lipbalm – three in one tiny bag!
What this stuff says about me? I hope it says I’m excited, happy and ready for anything. What I suspect it says is that I’m dreamy, super-connected, and always sneezing…
What’s in your everyday bag?
My Sunday looked like this…
After a week of the flu, a week off work (where I got to spend time with Rhiannon, Lizzie, Sarah, Annastasia and Claire – I have such fab friends!) and a week back at work, I was looking forward to a really chilled out weekend catching up with bits and pieces, pottering around the house, kitty cuddling and spending some quality time with the Miss Peregrine’s Peculiar Children book box set.
Alas, Poppy decided that the intermittent creak she’d had for a while was to get worse this week, and after a Monday spent cautiously driving Lizzie around, trying not to wince at the groaning noise coming from somewhere under the bonnet, I spent Saturday morning dropping her off at the garage. And getting the not unexpected, but also not terribly welcome, news that she needs new rear callipers and it’s not going to be cheap. Hmph.
I managed to squeeze in visiting with my cousin Briony and my Gran, a late lunch (and incredible red velvet & white chocolate cheesecake cake – I know, right?!) with Caitlin, and garden planning with my parents (a pirate ship is afoot), and was absolutely knackered by the time I got home.
So my Sunday looked like this. PJs all day, sleepy happy kitties, camera in hand and lots of sunshine (though it’s still pissweaseling cold out there – I made the mistake of popping into the garage barefoot. Brrr.)
I had a midday nap, I read lots of my book (actually three books so far today… finished two and started one), ate pasta and cake, and luxuriated in relaxing. I felt a bit guilty, but relaxed anyway.
And now I’m blogging – and pondering Susannah’s latest post. I don’t think blogging is dead – but I do think the approach to it is different now than when I started eleven years ago. My approach to it is different to what it was when I started (and if you’re reading this, that’s definitely a good thing!).
This blog is still in the process of shifting back to being just a blog (every time I try and move the site around, I get sidetracked with an idea for a post which always seems more important somehow!), and for me that’s quite a big shift. Everything I do ends up as a business eventually, but as I think I’ve said before, I miss having somewhere to just pour words and photos onto a screen, to record my life and loves and passions in one place, to tell the story of my life. I love connecting with people through my blog (and am always amazed that people read it), but ultimately this one is my living room online – my own little space on the web. People are welcome to drop by and linger as long as they like, but the space is ultimately mine, for me to reside in and make my own.
I’m inclined to agree with Susannah that it’s not dead, it’s just one of many forms of communicating and storytelling – and I’d argue that it’s now reached maturity, as a solid companion of both businesses and hobbyists. Its sense of community has never wavered, at least not for me behind this screen.
Perhaps that’s a pondering too deep for a Sunday evening. But I am filled with gratitude to be sitting here at my much-longed-for bureau, tapping these words into my laptop while my kitties snooze in their cat palace in the conservatory. I’m grateful for their safety and their love, their silliness and their calming influence on me. I love that though my portfolio career is ever changing and my life is always fluid, that I’ve created a lifestyle where I can spend my Sunday evenings writing and reading and processing photos in my very own house, surrounded by things & felines that make me happy.
The journey’s not over, but it’s good to be able to acknowledge that I’m in a good place along the way.
With love & unicorns,
Carla
I'm Carla, a quirky thirtysomething with a penchant for unicorns and glitter. I believe in magic and make-believe, and the gorgeous rebellion of making your life absolutely your own. And I'm a proud multipod!
I am a photographer and catalyst for small business owners, and a real life mermaid. I photograph people as they truly are, help women see and step into their brightest and best selves, add a sprinkling of magic to the mundane, and am a happy ambassador for stationery and slow living.
Proud to be both girly and geeky, when I’m not writing, photographing or daydreaming, you can find me dancing burlesque, riding my bicycle Bluebell, growing herbs and collecting typewriters.